Hallelujah
by Nnoifangirl5
Summary: Basically a songfic based on a secret talent of Russia's and Russia and Lithuania's messed up relationship.


**I've loved this song for the past few days and was randomly sitting around my room in the mood to write a story, and this just randomly wrote itself lol. I do not own the song or the anime!**

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><p>Every nation knew that the relationship between Russia and Lithuania was an abusive and cold one. Russia mistreated the little Baltic nation, even though Lithuania never rebelled, because he was afraid. Of course, they did not know every bit of what went on when the two were alone. They never knew the feelings the two shared and what really happened. The secrets that were kept.<p>

There wasn't just hate and abuse between the two nations. Russia did all the things he did out of love, just in his own way. Lithuania, despite all the pain being put through, loved the disturbed nation with all his heart. He still feared him, though, which is why he kept his feelings secret as much as possible.

Inside of Russia's mansion in the middle of nowhere, Lithuania knew every hallway and room all too well. There were memories in just about every inch of the house, some good, and some bad. Most just plain scary. He almost couldn't walk down the halls just to see the other Baltics without cringing at a familiar blood stain on the wall or smashed vase on a table.

He would sometimes, on rare occasion, pass by the music room, which held another secret many didn't know about. It was called the music room, but it was very bare except an old piano donated from Austria and a small window on the other side of the room. Lithuania would pass by the music room and hear the piano playing, tempted to walk inside.

He would peek his head inside and see Russia playing a beautiful song with sadness mixed into the tune, hearing him sing softly to himself. Russia would sense the other's presence and gesture him over to the bench to sit with him and watch him play. Lithuania would simply smile and join the larger nation in front of the old piano, laying his head on his shoulder as he listened to the songs he would play. Sure, he was no Austria, but Russia had a way with music.

A song Russia would play often was one that Lithuania never really understood, but could tell it meant a lot to Russia in one way or another.

_I've heard there was a secret chord  
>That David played, and it pleased the Lord<br>But you don't really care for music, do you?  
>It goes like this<br>The fourth, the fifth  
>The minor fall, the major lift<br>The baffled king composing Hallelujah_

Russia's voice simply amused Lithuania for some reason, especially when he sang that one song. It was such a sad song, but it made him smile as he watched Russia play and listened to his soft voice.

_Hallelujah  
>Hallelujah<br>Hallelujah  
>Hallelujah…<em>

The only thing he hated about Russia's musical talent was that it would make him angry. Lithuania could never figure out exactly why, but he feared the moment when the notes would stop playing and Russia's hand would fly down to strike a few random keys at once in anger. "Toris, how many times must I tell you?" Russia would growl and grab Lithuania by his hair, lifting him from the ground. He would always make up something different and pointless to be mad about…

"Never interrupt my music!" "Don't touch me when I'm playing!" "Keep your fucking distance!" "Stop being so stupid!" "Only be near me when I want you to!" "Stay with the other Baltics when I leave you alone!"

Lithuania knew he didn't mean any of the words that the Russian would yell at him, but it would still bring a few tears to him. "R-Russia-san, I am sorry. I will remember next time." He'd say with a few soft whimpers. "Not good enough." Russia would say, carrying him out of the room by his hair. Lithuania was surprised all his hair hadn't already fallen out.

He would try to keep quiet as he was dragged along in an angry fit of rage into another room, a much less friendly one than the music room that he had better memories in was. He thought the rest of the house was in painful ruins, he was in for a shock every time he entered this room. Windows were broken, blood stained the walls, there were shreds of cloth everywhere. On one side of the room was a large bed and in the middle of the room was a pole that reached the ceiling. There were also a few devices of torture the Russian enjoyed using.

Russia took Lithuania's trembling hands and tied them together, attaching them to the pole in the middle of the room so that the Baltic was looking at his bare feet and bent over slightly. Russia would then take a sharp knife and slice through his shirt, discarding the shreds to the side. "You stupid, stupid boy…" Ivan would mutter as he pressed the sharp knife to his back. Toris would wince as he felt the blade run swiftly down his already broken skin.

The knife would run in all directions down his back, drawing blood with each new scar added. Lithuania knew what Russia wanted from all this, but was too afraid to supply. Of course, he would once it was demanded. "I wanna hear your pain." Russia would say in his ear, immediately triggering a soft cry from the younger nation. As much as Russia wanted screams from his broken toy, the cries satisfied his sadistic cravings. After a few minutes when he thought he had done a sufficient job, he would kick Lithuania in the back of the legs or punch him in the stomach, sending him to his knees.

"I'll come get you when I feel like it." Was Ivan's usual response as he shut the door, leaving Lithuania alone and in pain in the dark room. Toris would sit in silence for hours a lot, the only thing calming him was playing Russia's song over and over in his mind.

_Your faith was strong but you needed proof  
>You saw her bathing on the roof<br>Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you  
>She tied you to a kitchen chair<br>She broke your throne, and she cut your hair  
>And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah<em>

After a few hours, he would hear the door open and soon feel the Russian's arms around him. "Toris…forgive me." Lithuania's green eyes would lift up to greet Russia's violet ones. Russia would untie the restraints around Lithuania's wrists and help him stand up on wobbly legs. "Let's get you upstairs, my love. I've made you some dinner." His calm voice would say as he pulled him up the stairs.

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
>Hallelujah, Hallelujah<em>

Lithuania would walk into the dimly lit kitchen with Russia, smelling a delicious meal. Another of Russia's secrets: he was a wonderful chef. He would prepare many things such as stroganoff, chicken pudding, koulebiaka, and top it off with chocolate vodka for dessert. The Lithuanian wasn't much of a drinker, but would accept and smile as he and the Russian would eat together.

After dinner, and after Russia had consumed some drinks of plain vodka, Lithuania would earn a lazy smile from Russia. "Toris, my love, come and stay in my room tonight. The others will do fine without you for a night." He said. Lithuania could tell in his voice that it wasn't a question, it was a demand. Of course, who was he to object? The two would stand from the table and walk down the now darkened halls of Russia's home once again, walking up to Russia's room.

_Baby I have been here before  
>I know this room, I've walked this floor<br>I used to live alone before I knew you.  
>I've seen your flag on the marble arch<br>Love is not a victory march  
>It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah<em>

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
>Hallelujah, Hallelujah<em>

Almost as soon as they entered Russia's room, the larger nation would pin the smaller one to the wall, capturing him in a passionate kiss. The smaller boy could only kiss back softly, eyes closing as Russia's hands would wander a while into the kiss that seemed to never end. "Toris…" Russia would breath softly between kissing, causing the younger nation to look up at his captor, his tormentor, his lover.

At that, Ivan picked Lithuania up and carried him over to the bed where Lithuania had spent far too many nights. He remembered being there even when he was a younger nation than he already was, he remembered his first few nights there when Russia first broke him. Even though it was a painful memory, he was happy that it was Russia that did it and nobody else.

Russia's hands around his wrists brought him back to the present as their passionate kisses proceeded, clothes slipping off every other moment. Russia would take a few seconds to gaze at the beautiful sight before him, his dearest Lithuania. All his. He would observe all the scars, marks, bruises on his skin, all inflicted by his own hands. He would see a moment of regret as a tear rolled down his cheek.

"Russia-san? Is something the matter?" Lithuania would say, sitting up to comfort him. "How could you love me, Toris? How could you love me after all I do to you? I destroy you and I'm killing you day by day. Yet you love me for some reason." Ivan sobbed. "I will not stop loving you, Russia. No matter what you do, it will not affect my feelings." Lithuania said kindly and truthfully.

_There was a time you let me know  
>What's really going on below<br>But now you never show it to me, do you?  
>And remember when I moved in with you<br>The holy dove was moving too  
>And every breath we drew was Hallelujah<em>

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah_  
><em>Hallelujah, Hallelujah<em>

Hours would pass in seconds to the two nations, their familiar game of passion and love isolating them from the rest of the world. The Baltics in the other room could hear their sounds of pleasure, even though they never brought it up. They were just happy it wasn't them. Even though to Lithuania, it was bliss. He was happy to share these intimate moments with Russia, no matter how painful. It was love to him, and it was all he knew and wanted to know of passion.

"I love you, Toris…" Russia would whisper into the small nation's ear as he drifted off to sleep. Lithuania would watch the nation breathe in and out during sleep as he himself felt his eyes get heavier and heavier…

Of course, mornings were different. Lithuania always knew what was coming so he would try to sneak out before Russia would wake up, but never really succeeded. Russia's violet eyes would open and would glance over to Lithuania's naked body beside him, sleeping soundly. Again seeing the bruises and scars, he would go into a fit of anger and rage.

"Out. Get out of my room." He growled, pushing Lithuania out of his bed. Lithuania hit the floor with a loud thump, waking up soon after. "I-I'm so sorry, Russia-san, we must have-" Lithuania's sentence was cut off by a smack in his face from the Russian. "Do not involve me in this. We have done absolutely nothing, Toris, nothing!" he yelled as Lithuania yelped, running out of the room.

Russia confused Lithuania to no end. He was a wonderful lover, but the cruelest man on earth. One minute they were in love and the next, Russia was slowly killing him. Whatever happened, the two were in love beyond any belief, and Lithuania did not mind how it was expressed. Even when Russia was cruel to him, his mind would travel to their music room, Russia's voice soothing his mind…

_Maybe there's a God above  
>But all I've ever learned from love<br>Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you  
>It's not a cry you can hear at night<br>It's not somebody who has seen the light  
>It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah<em>

_Hallelujah, Hallelujah_  
><em>Hallelujah, Hallelujah<em>

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><p><strong>Hope you guys liked the story! Review please! <strong>


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